So recently, between reading through Psalms and David's relationship with God and a blog I read, I came to a realization about myself. It started after I read a blog
( http://calebhickerson.wordpress.com/2011/08/31/repentance/ this blog in fact. Check it out). At one point he says how God wanted him to have a relationship and love God. Whether he intended it to mean this or God spoke to me through that, it made me think. What have my relationships looked like and what has my relationship with God looked like.
Lets start by looking at a relationship with a woman. First, I pursue her. I make sure she knows I'm interested in her. I do things so that I can be close to her. And then I make sacrifices so that I can do things with her. And then I thought about my relationship with God. I sit. I talk to Him and I read some of the things He has to say. But do I pursue Him? Wow, what a realization I had. Granted I like God and I wanna be near Him and be in his presence, but where is the urgency and desire? I don't sacrifice other things to be near Him. For girlfriend I may skip doing something I wanted to do to be able to be with her. With God, I try to see where the crack in my schedule are so that I can try and stuff God in there.
I've known for a long time that I have issues with prioritizing God, but this somewhat slapped my in the face. The things I am willing to do for someone who is human and I will be with for, at most, 60 or 70 years. Why am I not willing to do that for my creator. For the God that loves me so much, He is willing to let me make stupid mistake in order for my love for Him to be real. He loved me so much that died in order for me to continue to live. He was a perfect example of love and of what I should desire to be, yet I still find myself trying to fit God into my already tightly packed schedule.
I have talked about how, if we pursue God that life and joy and happiness flows from that. However, you can see how well I practice some of the things I know. It's just hard for me to first seek God and just simply trust that He will provide time and energy for the rest. But He does, and He will. I must learn to pursue and seek God, like He will pursue me. Praise God that He is so great, even when I am so ... not great.
Love ya'll
OptimisticPrime
